Over the passed few years I have worked at the pool, I have had the privilege of seeing things I in no way ever want to see again.... one individual imparticular.... the individual is the reason we have a weight limit posted on our slide because they thought they could fit their large mass in the tiny hole.........
This individual is the most ornery man you will ever meet in your entire life. ( I would be too if I had to carry around all that weight) He always finds something to complain about, usually our lifeguards. My favorite encounter with him happened a few months ago. I was in the office and I heard a double whistle (we HG have been trained answer to whistles ... much like dogs..) so I went to go see what the "fun" was. The man asked to see the person in charge, and I was the lucky one. I went up and he began to tell me his new complaint. He apparently took time out of his extremely important life to sit and stare at one of my life guards. And in his starring he discovered that the lifeguard was in a "daze" and was not moving his head... or eyes (something most lifeguards do, but would never admit too) He then proceeded to time the life guard and count how many times he moved his EYES. The grand total came to 7. Now yes this is a valid complaint and a good concern...but really come on.... OH I forgot one crucial detail... there were ONLY 3 people in the water... the large man's nephew and the large man (I count him as two people) I know few people who lack a life so much that they find joy in counting how many times a lifeguard moves his eyes... they should discover the world of blogging.....
This individual is the most ornery man you will ever meet in your entire life. ( I would be too if I had to carry around all that weight) He always finds something to complain about, usually our lifeguards. My favorite encounter with him happened a few months ago. I was in the office and I heard a double whistle (we HG have been trained answer to whistles ... much like dogs..) so I went to go see what the "fun" was. The man asked to see the person in charge, and I was the lucky one. I went up and he began to tell me his new complaint. He apparently took time out of his extremely important life to sit and stare at one of my life guards. And in his starring he discovered that the lifeguard was in a "daze" and was not moving his head... or eyes (something most lifeguards do, but would never admit too) He then proceeded to time the life guard and count how many times he moved his EYES. The grand total came to 7. Now yes this is a valid complaint and a good concern...but really come on.... OH I forgot one crucial detail... there were ONLY 3 people in the water... the large man's nephew and the large man (I count him as two people) I know few people who lack a life so much that they find joy in counting how many times a lifeguard moves his eyes... they should discover the world of blogging.....
9 comments:
you are so funny!!!! I love it! I am so glad I am done with the pool. Even though I do miss it at times. Lets get together soon!
I know! I gotta!
oh Mary...the joys of lifeguarding.
remember that lovely boy that we kicked out and he called your racsist and you told him your mom died. That was funny.
Even funnier, remember when that one kid annoyed you so bad you swore and then he kept calling you potty mouth?
I'll never admit to missing lifeguarding, ok because I really don't. But there were some funny times!
I agree. Save our eyes people! haha
Hey, my family is gone now and I did not make american idol. haha! We should swim again! Still no news about what we are gonna do about the whole house thing. hopefully good news will come soon!
can you please make a new post. I am sick of looking at this one! Haha. Just teasing! I am going to come live with you for a week!
Fat People Should Not Swim... but ESPECIALLY Should Not Wear Bikinis or Speedos.
Hey MAry, I found your blog thru Skye's. I totally am glad I am done with lifeguarding. Haha. Keep in touch!
Mary, update your blog this minute!!
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